On behalf of mum’s children and grandchildren thank you all for coming. Especially those of senior years and poor health, we appreciate your effort to attend. I apologise to those who I did not contact, please forgive me. You can write to us at 27 Caldew Close if you wish.

Mum comes from an era and background that is difficult to grasp in today’s world.

Born Romford Kent 1923 she was a southerner but became a fully fledged northern lass after the obligatory waiting period.

Her mother suffered the consequences of the First World War and its aftermath and was left with four children to bring up on her own. Their poverty is hard to understand now; they were thrown out of their rented council house because they could not pay the rent and there was so little food that mum was diagnosed as malnourished and at school was given extra nutrition. She remembers cold bedrooms and the kindness of her sister who gave her a coat as an extra blanket.

She left school at 14 and had no further education, but her personal qualities do not need paper qualifications. We recognise her humour and wit; her patience and understanding; her wisdom and kindness; her intelligence and perception.

The Second World War affected her, like many of you of a similar age. She remembers, in London, her brother Ernie digging a hole in the garden putting a double mattress in it, covering it with corrugated iron sheeting and putting earth on top. That was the bed for her mum and children in all weathers while the bombs rained down in the Blitz. I remember my tuneless whistle once had mum gripping the sink in fear because it reminded her of the whistle of the bombs. Sorry mum.

Isn’t it wonderful to see that in one lifetime she can go from such discomfort to the luxury and wonderful community of the sheltered housing flat. We thank all of you in that community for your mutual caring.

The War brought a handsome sub-mariner and pretty Wren together and Dad brought his bride up to Cumberland, Carlisle and Clan Nicholson. It must have been a happy marriage because each year they produced a new child, for three years at least. I had two sisters and nagged for a brother and eventually they obliged with good old Kev my kid brother.

Mum and growing things were part of our lives from infancy. I thought I really was born in a cabbage patch because we spent so much happy time in our allotment; it was what you did, and what you did you ate. I can still remember the winter mornings when I would be sent to pick brussels with freezing fingers.

That was the period when a careful mum and hard working dad worked and saved so they could escape from the terraced house with outside toilet and tin bath with shared bathwater. They encouraged us to pass that 11 plus and wanted a new semi that they thought would fit the new opportunities that we children should have. Dad said that we should leave the world a bit better than when we came to it. They certainly did that for us by giving us a good start in life.

Mum had a love of life and sense of adventure; on holiday in Aviemore, she rode a pushbike fearlessly, although somewhat wobbly, and Mum and Dad went riding off with great merriment and laughter. Only on her return did she announce she hadn’t been on a bike for over thirty years!

I said to mum once that with her childhood she would have had enough excuses for her to have become a baddy on an ASBO. Why, I asked had she become the intelligent wise person we know. Her answer was that there are some things you are born with and there is good in people, they just need to find a way for the good to come out.

Her understanding and forgiving attitude was shown when there was a theft and I asked her what she thought of the thief. She thought then said “I feel so sorry for him because his life must be so bad that he feels he has to do this.”

Mum’s spiritual and intellectual journey through life led her to Church of Scotland, Transcendental Meditation and Quakers. She remembered with great affection people and activities associated with those groups.

Mum’s sharing and friendship led her and dad to help with the Stroke Club and mum developed craft classes and many of you will have seen her own work which she was very unassuming about but which we all admire. Please excuse me if I omit any groups or people who I should acknowledge, but I do recall her chatting with pride and affection about the friends she met at Townswomen’s Guild and Wrens, Burnside Court and … forgive me I have forgotten.

Your memories are important and I thank you for comments on your cards such as “young at heart; positive; enthusiasm for life; not complaining; a pleasure to talk to; always good for a chat and a chuckle; sound views based on logic and intelligence;
an aura of calm, understanding and wisdom; an inspiration to many.

Mum died peacefully in her own bed in her own lovely flat; she went to sleep and didn’t wake up. We thank her doctors and the health professionals who took such a genuine interest in her care and did all she wanted.

Do you remember the Desiderata poem that always hung in the hall; I have taken some lines

Go placidly amidst the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
Be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, they too have their story.
Be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy
It is still a beautiful world.
Peter
March 14th 2010